हाइकु रचनाएँ।
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आतंकी साया
दो कबूतर साथ
अमरनाथ
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दोहन वृत्ति
भूकंप बाढ़ वृष्टि
नग्न धरती
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फाल्गुन पक्ष
ताज़े खिलते फूल
चित्रक दक्ष
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हरित रास
पुष्पों का मधुमास
नव सृजन
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सूर्य उदय
तटबंध किनारे
साधक सारे
------------------------
सर्वाधिकार सुरक्षित /त्रिभवन कौल
==========
आतंकी साया
दो कबूतर साथ
अमरनाथ
------------------
दोहन वृत्ति
भूकंप बाढ़ वृष्टि
नग्न धरती
-----------------------
फाल्गुन पक्ष
ताज़े खिलते फूल
चित्रक दक्ष
-----------------------
हरित रास
पुष्पों का मधुमास
नव सृजन
----------------------
सूर्य उदय
तटबंध किनारे
साधक सारे
------------------------
सर्वाधिकार सुरक्षित /त्रिभवन कौल
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अकेला इलाहाबादी
बहुत सुंदर।
August 2 at 10:41pm
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Hema Pandey लाजवाब
August 2 at 11:05pm
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Nanda Noor
उम्दा*#
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August 2 at 11:17pm
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August 2 at 11:27pm
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वाह
August 2 at 11:34pm
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गुप्ता कुमार सुशील
वाहह अनुपम उद्गार आदरणीय.🙏
August 3 at 2:11am
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Sharda Madra
वाह अद्भुत हाइकु सृजन।बधाई।
August 3 at 6:22am
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लाज़वाब हाइकु 👍👍👌👌
सादर _/\_
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सुंदर छवियाँ उकेरी हैं - अज्ञेय जी की हाइकू याद आ गईं !
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Amit Dahiyabadshah
Teen pankti khoob bhaayein
Ati sundar kshanikaye
haiku kyune kehlaye
+++
Now its a Haiku Trib huzoor (5,7,5)
Hai hai haiku, kshanika kyune kehlaye?
/:-}D
August 4 at 11:34pm
+++
Amit Dahiyabadshah
Tribhawan Kaul sahib
August 4 at 3:49am
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Tribhawan Kaul
हिंदी में हाइकू पसंद करने के लिए आप का हार्दिक धन्यवाद। :)
August 3 at 10:22pm
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Tribhawan Kaul
Amit ji . Namaskar. "How its a Haiku Trib huzoor (5,7,5)?" Unlike syllable counts in Japnese Haikus, in hindi we have vern/akshr count. We should have akshar in each line in the same counting as in haiku i.e.जापानी हाइकू विधा को हिंदी में कुछ इस तरह से...See More
August 4 at 8:44am
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Tribhawan Kaul
Now coming to kshnikayen (क्षणिकाएं) these are short poems in free verses ( no syllable/akshar count) but if possible, making a statement within/upto 50-60 words:)
August 4 at 9:15am
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Tribhawan Kaul
I know you know far better than I yet.....I hope I have answered your query to your satisfaction. :)
August 4 at 9:12am
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Tribhawan Kaul
I am little preplexed at the emoji of sadness above in reply to my comment.:) _/\_ :)
August 4 at 9:16am
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Amit Dahiyabadshah
Haiku may syllables ginay jayenge na ki akshar Trib sahib. Alphabets and words have no relevance in a sple haiku of 5.7.5. Your poems are beautiful kshanikas why diminish them with a name that simply does not apply. Heres a bilingual haiku for you Trib sahib
August 4 at 11:31pm
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Amit Dahiyabadshah
Kaan chhed kara lo
A young girls first taste of pain
A promise of more
August 4 at 11:33pm
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Tribhawan Kaul
Amit Dahiyabadshah Well. Can't go against the established & prevalent practice so far as Haikus writing in Hindi is concerned. We may agree to disagree. :)
August 5 at 9:58pm
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Tribhawan Kaul http://www.abhivyakti-hindi.org/rach.../2005/hindi_haiku.htm
August 5 at 9:58pm
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Tribhawan Kaul
Kshnikayen has its own charm and a unique way of expressing a thought. No issues on this. :)
August 5 at 10:01pm
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Amit Dahiyabadshah
I cant understand why anyone writing good poetry in one language would want to rename its form by borrowing from another language. Pl lets not have an argument on something so fundamentally flawed in definition
August 5 at 10:40pm
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Tribhawan Kaul
Yes. No issues at all :)
August 5 at 10:39pm
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Amit Dahiyabadshah
The Amarnath kshanika is one of the finest poems ever written on that subject Trib sahib. A splendid kshanika indeed and worth inspiring younger poets on how to write a lovely kshanika.
August 5 at 10:44pm
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Tribhawan Kaul
Amit Dahiyabadshah Coming from you Amit ji. It means a lot. :)
August 5 at 10:47pm
-------------------------------via fb/Delhi Poetree
via fb/Delhi Poetree (Complete comment conneted to fifth comment above.)
ReplyDelete--------------------
Tribhawan Kaul
Amit ji . Namaskar. "How its a Haiku Trib huzoor (5,7,5)?" Unlike syllable counts in Japnese Haikus, in hindi we have vern/akshr count. We should have akshar in each line in the same counting as in haiku i.e.जापानी हाइकू विधा को हिंदी में कुछ इस तरह से अपनाया गया है। 5-7-5.हाइकु सत्रह (१७) अक्षर में लिखी जाने वाली सबसे छोटी कविता है। इसमें तीन पंक्तियाँ रहती हैं। प्रथम पंक्ति में ५ अक्षर, दूसरी में ७ और तीसरी में ५ अक्षर रहते हैं। संयुक्त अक्षर को एक अक्षर गिना जाता है, जैसे 'सुगन्ध' में तीन अक्षर हैं - सु-१, ग-१, न्ध-१) तीनों वाक्य अलग-अलग होने चाहिए। अर्थात एक ही वाक्य को ५,७,५ के क्रम में तोड़कर नहीं लिखना है। बल्कि तीन पूर्ण पंक्तियाँ हों। Remaining it is like Japanes haiku so far as presenting a visualisation (बिम्ब ) is concerned.:)
Like · Reply · August 4 at 8:44am
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